Wednesday, September 3, 2014

A Tribute

Me & Al at UCO 30 year reunion & celebration of Al's work at APU

I was 17 when I first met him. I was on my very first un-chaperoned trip with my best friend Emily. We were visiting APU in the spring of our senior year of high school for their Preview Days. We stayed in a dorm. We had all kinds of activities and fun ice breaker games, we had a tour of the campus an an awesome time of worship in the chapel services.

But what I was really there for was to audition for the music groups that would consume much of my time in college. As a freshman, I was only allowed to participate in certain groups. I had been waiting a very long time time in a very long line for an audition with the director of those groups. Sitting in the hall way of the music building, low-pile carpet just on top of concrete...the faint music of many students practicing instruments, voice and piano muted in the practice rooms. There were lots of other students nervously glancing around the hallways waiting for their turn too. There I sat with Emily, giggling and enjoying our first freedoms.

A door just down the hall opened and Al Clifft stepped into the hallway, his tall slight frame was anything but scary! He said, "Anyone want to come and audition for me?" Emily raised my hand before I could protest. Al locked eyes with me and I knew I could not say no know. Those eyes. I walked into his office and handed him a cassette tape (hello 2000). I took a deep breath and let the music and my voice go. I sang an old hymn like my life depended on it. I wish I could invite you all into that office--that intimate safe place where all the fear and nervousness that should be in audition melted away by looking into those eyes that say "I believe in you! God has great purpose for you" all without saying a word.

"I'd rather have Jesus, than silver or gold.
I'd rather have him than have riches untold.
I'd rather have Jesus, than houses or land.
I'd rather be lead by his nail pierced hand.

Than to be the king of a vast domain
Or be held in sin's dread sway
I'd rather have Jesus than anything t
This world affords today

I'd rather have Jesus than men's applause,
I'd rather be faithful to his dear cause
I'd rather have Jesus than all fortune or fame
I'd rather be true to His holy name.

Than to be the king of a vast domain
Or be held in sin's dread sway
I'd rather have Jesus than anything
This world affords today"

When the song ended, Al sat there with tears brimming. Not a testament to my singing--a testament to his heart. There was nothing more that Al wanted than to have Jesus fully at the center of his life, all he did and who he was. I saw this flow out of him for the next four years! On the spot he gave me the highest available scholarship at the time. He asked if I knew what that meant and of course I smiled and nodded my head--I really had no idea! I walked out of the room knowing that I had a place in Bel Canto, but also a reservation of sorts in UCO when the time came.

When I began APU in the fall (through a variety of miraculous circumstances you can read here)
I had no idea what college life would be like. I had no idea what classes I had or what schedules would be like. There was someone who had seen everything in his days at APU and became sort of an anchor for me. Al. He was my freshman music theory teacher...I was horrible but he was great! That started a great relationship. My sophomore year I was in UCO. The first week of choir camp I was in love with Al--no not that way. I felt like I had another grandpa on campus. I was safe. I was cared for. I was loved. I was known. I was valued. And you know what, I know just about every other person in UCO who had come before me or after me felt the same way. No Al was not perfect--but he loved Jesus more than anything. He loved excellence from us. He LOVED to lead us students and in turn the audience into worship. He loved Jesus and it was so obvious. I wish that all could experience being lead by this man to worship--in life too. His whole body was involved in communicating and evoking just what was needed in each song. It was glorious to watch--but even better to know. 

Sometimes on a bad day, I would walk to the music hall and on my way pray that Al would be in his office...he had the tiniest window in his door and if you walked by just right, you would catch his eye. There were several times when I would be in need of encouragement and he would wave me into his office and ask me what was on my mind. Those moments are gifts. He was so busy, but never too busy to point me to Christ.

Al had a tradition on choir tour where he took one person each day or so and asked them to come to the front of the room. He invited the 100+ members of the choir and orchestra to shower that person with encouragement. I had the great blessing of being the recipient of this gift at one time in my life--some of the words shared there are some that I STILL TREASURE.

Al "retired" my junior year...someone that good, that gifted and that heaven blessed never truly retires! We had the opportunity at the end of our choir tour to return the favor to Al. We sat in a room and encouraged him. For about 2 1/2 hours--every single person in the room had something to say about who Al had been to them. Me? I did not say anything to him. I simply locked eyes with him like he did at every concert and communicated without saying a word. Ask anyone in UCO and they know what I am talking about. A whole conversation said without saying a word. I don't know how one person can make every person feel like they are the only one--and yet, each one fully knew that they were not the only one! GAH! Such a gift.

Even 9 years after my time at APU Al and I were in occasional communication. He and his lovely wife Glenna chose to support us financially and in prayer for our adoption. Just a few months after they gave to us, their life became very difficult. It pains me to know that I was not able to share with Al our "1 year report" as a family of 6...I bet he has a pretty good view at the moment!

I will fly back to APU and say goodbye to this great man of God. I cannot wait to worship God for all of his wondrous deeds and remember the ways that Al helped me become more aware of them.

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

First Days

This picture captures so much of my little man. Creative, silly, strong, imaginative, happy. I just love it.  

Clara started first grade at a public school.  You can see the uncertainty in here eyes here. Kinda rips my heart out! She was ready and has done really very well her first week and a half of school. There was a small incident at the end of her first day where she was lost and on the verge of becoming totally overwhelmed when her rescuer--Cousin Olivia--happened to find her and direct her to the right area. Thank God for Olivia being in the right spot at the right time. One of the paramount reasons I chose this school--family help & accountability. 

They all look so cute! Olivia looks so grown up! 

All of the kids helped Clara get acclimated on the first day and celebrate her. We had a short prayer time for her in the car before we was the sweetest thing I have ever heard in my life. 

Runiversary--a reflection on how running has changed me

This month marks my 5 year RUNNIVERSARY! I realize to some--you may be rolling your eyes--this doesn't seem like a big deal. To me this is something enormous to celebrate. I will probably even buy myself a new pair of shoes. This is an obscenely long narrative about running. I know. I haven't blogged in forever and I pick running. But I have things to say and things to process and I wont let this part of my life go undocumented.

Five years ago this August I was in the throws of postpartum depression. I had a beautiful, but cranky baby and a demanding 18 month old. Having two under two was way harder than I imagined. I was one moment short of taking the crazy train with no return trip. It was ugly. In an effort to help my brain and my heart and potentially save me from that dark pit, I knew I had to do something. On a budget, short on time and sleep and with the temperature soaring well over 100* I did the only logical thing, I started running.  The first years of running my thighs created so much friction they could start a fire, (the thigh gap has never happened for me people). My gut giggled so severely that I was sure the people down the street could feel the sonic boom (because of course everyone was looking at me while I ran in my neighborhood, at night). And I was breathing so loud that I could hear myself over the passing cars...oh it was awful. But so good. I would run for a time and would call Owen from my phone and he would say, "Judah is still crying. Keep running". In desperation to not hear him wailing, I would. Somehow in the midst of the great effort I was making to run, something changed in my mind. The crazy train station seemed farther away and the track to logic and loving my family seemed much closer.
There's me...trying to avoid the crazy train. August 2009
Don't get me wrong here, it's not like I went out and ran for an hour. I was gone for maybe 20 minutes...and I ran maybe one mile. I would walk sometimes. I ran slow (for fear of fire remember) but I kept going. Every other day or so I would go on a run. Each time it got easier and well, not easier, but I didn't think I would die. And one day I realized that I actually enjoyed running. Not the physical discomfort of running...but the clearing of the mind that much time to talk with the Lord about how I was feeling. Listening to His truth through music while running. I loved the determination that it created in my mind & body. If there was a point that I always felt tired, I would be determined to push through and not give up....I ran with a group of ladies from church occasionally and a couple of really close girlfriends (there are only a few gals I'd let see the sonic boom). I even ran around the Tempe Beach Park which had always been a secret goal of mine.

Then one day by God's great design I met a great gal named Grace (oh how I miss you so much Grace!) who said that she was thinking of training for a half marathon. I had been running for 2 years (even through half of Wesley's pregnancy) and I was secretly hoping to be able to do something bigger like this! We committed. We trained. We sweated and talked, and bonded. We shared the Lord, we shared our spiritual growth and struggles and we crossed the finish line! What an amazing experience. To try and explain what running 210 training miles with someone does for a friendship is beyond me. Thank you from the bottom of my heart Grace!

Ran on the beach at Top sail Island and met the family on the pier.
It would be a major mistake for me not to mention Owen in this...he is the reason I can run. He puts my runs on his calendar...because he loves me. He wants me to run, and even when I am ehem, not being myself Owen gently suggests that I go on a run. Who does that? Having his support so in this particular area means the world to me--and I am pretty awesome, but I can no longer push my children in the bob and run. They weigh too much. He watches them for me every time I go. No gym membership here, just a marriage membership for life.

2 years ago I trained for a local half marathon by myself and I thought I would never be able to do it alone. I did. Running continues to teach me that I can do more than I thought I could.I can honestly say I LOVED training for this particular half marathon. For some reason too, I feel it spreads more discipline to other areas of my life. One specific way is through reading THE WORD. Although I have been a Christian since I was little, I have ebbed and flowed significantly in the area of Bible reading. Sometimes going for years on end without consistent (or any) time in THE WORD. Something clicked for me after I started running--I am compelled to do this. Granted, I have asked that the Lord specifically light a fire in my heart, a need & passion for Bible reading, and He is so faithful. Don't get me wrong, I don't think that running makes me read the Bible...hahaha.  I think that the discipline of running has made me desire discipline in other areas of my life because the result has been so rewarding. 

Last year I trained for another half marathon by myself too...this year was so difficult. More than I could ever say. We had a new house, a new baby, and a family member in major crisis. I barely made it through any of the training runs. Each time I dreaded my run. I felt guilty for the time it took away from the family. I felt sore. I felt mentally absent from the focus my body needed. Significant stress is a major downer on any physical work out...but--physical work outs put stress into major submission. Even though I did not want to or feel like running, I committed (translate, I already paid for this race long before I knew life would be as challenging as it was--I am the cheapest person you will ever meet and I'll run myself into the ground before I pay for something and not get the benefit out of it!)--and I did it. I did the training runs. I ran the race. I improved my time. I finished.
Just before the Half Marathon in 2014. So nervous but
Happy to have my special girl.  And  yes, I wore makeup

This year I look forward to training with my mind in the game so to speak. I am going to do the half marathon in January again and am hoping to get under 2 hours---I was at 2:01 last year. UGH! I would encourage you--especially if you are a mama to young ones to find that one thing that is for you, but also translates into the other areas of your life. For me running has been the ticket.

On the strictly vain physical side, running has its benefits too. I'll be honest, I have been running for 5 years and I am just now getting to where I want to be with my physical appearance--It's worth it. Last year as I was going to the marathon expo, I was pushing our double bob stroller and someone said, "You look like a runner, do you know where the expo is?" After my jaw fell to the floor and I threw my arms around this perfect stranger and swore my love to her for this fantastic compliment, I said, "follow me."

Happy Runniversary to me!

If you run and don't have a GPS watch, you need one.

The best place after a race, leaning on a pile of ice. 

Wednesday, August 6, 2014


This time last year was such an intense time for our family--I cannot help but reflect where we were at this time last year compared to today. I don't know about you, but whenever the anniversary of an intense time comes, I have to really think about how things have changed. How God has taught me and shaped me and rejoice at His work.

Last night as we took the long drive to Judah's meet the teacher night for his home school enrichment program, it dawned on me that tomorrow (Wednesday) was a monumental day in our lives last year! I remember walking Clara to the same classroom we walked Judah to--meeting the teacher for the first time and seeing other home schooling families with their kids. I remember too, a woman who had a very fresh baby wrapped in a baby sling and my heart ached. I wanted that to be me so bad. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that God had a perfect baby ready for our family at the perfect moment, and I knew statistically that our time was most likely coming to an end. My head tried to tell my heart that all the time! I ached though.

The next day (wednesday of that week) my mom had flown into town to help move us into our new home. We had a busy day of picking out fabric for bedding that my mom planned to make, moving some items, welcoming the carpet & tile cleaning crew and having a family dinner at my sisters house. My mom had yet to see our actual house--so after dinner Owen took the kids home and my mom and I headed over to the new house to get her settled and to hide a HUGE birthday present for my niece (so I was told) in my house. I was so annoyed to have someone else's stuff to store. It was after 8 pm before we got close to wrapped up and were just sitting at our dinning room table (the only piece of furniture in the house). My phone rang...I assumed it was Owen but it said "No CALLER ID". Any waiting family knows that a late night call could be THE CALL. I picked up like a crazy person and tried to get my voice to sound calm. It was not my case worker, but the program supervisor. We got past the pleasantries and I pointedly asked her why she was calling me so late--she proceeded to tell me that my case worker was out of town and that she felt prompted from the Lord to call and ask if she could share our profile with a birthmother whom they had struggled to find a match for. In that moment, beyond a shadow of a doubt, I knew that this woman was carrying our child. Before knowing her name, before knowing her situation, before anything else was said, an assurance settled in my heart (mixed in of course because I am a crazy human, with fear, excitement, joy). I said we were committed to being available to anything that the Lord presented to us. The supervisor went on to say that her situation was a little outside of our scope--but I quickly said that at this point we threw our scope out the door--we can put our perimeters around what we think we want and what we think we can handle--but God's plan is already perfect.  There were very little details actually available at this time to protect this mom and father...I scribbled some notes...I didn't even have names...but we were certainly willing to be available. We said YES. And by we, I mean I. Owen and I had spoken so often of this moment that I knew that he would be OK with this.

I hung up the phone and my mom pulls out that HUGE gift "for my niece". She told me to open it. I told her that it was for Olivia...I am slow sometimes people. My mom had made a beautiful home warming present for me..pictured above. It is so special having something hand crafted just for me from my mom. She even free-handed the lettering. The Word can speak so much more powerfully than anything...there were tears.To know that my mom was walking this road with us and pointing me to Christ in this hard time of waiting (and worrying--the money, the perfect fit, the birth family relationships, the unknown and complete lack of control) There was assurance within the unknown. And then there was so much more to be done!

Thursday (the next day) I am literally carrying boxes up and down  stairs getting ready for our move day (friday) and I have my cell phone practically tethered to my body. It rang finally about 11:30 that day--hoping it was our agency, I dropped the boxes I was carrying and saw an out of state number. I almost didn't answer. But I did and it was our funding agency Lifesong for the Orphan. The woman on the other end of the phone said she had good news--their funding board had re-reviewed our case and wanted to give us a matching grant that we did not apply for. This grant made our adoption 99% funded (we still had $11.00 balance haha). I cried. I was totally incapable of talking. I knew that I knew that I knew that the birth mom I had learned about just the night before would choose our family for her baby.

Yes. "My God will supply all of my needs according to His riches in Christ Jesus".

He provides. He plans. He orchestrates. He leads. He keeps His promises. Today we will proclaim His good works in our family. Only His plan could be this good.

Saturday, August 2, 2014

Reviving--picture catch up

Wesley Turned 3 and he looked just like this kid on his birthday card.

steeling my heart.

The boys learned that if they played in the mud without permission they have to take a bath in the laundry room sink

We refinished our cabinets and our kitchen & play room were welcomed to the 21st century! 

Clara accepted Jesus Christ as her savior 

We have precious time with our birth mom--as you can see Julia loves it too! 

Sisters growing bond

someone found her toes

Wesley fell in love with Julia on this day. It was beautiful

Rach and I got to go see The Bible, Son of God tour. It was great. 

Clara became a teenager for a moment.


all the grandkids! 

Celebrating my birthday with my sis--we look only slightly alike here! 

Really? No words needed

mothers day with all the mothers

My favorite picture & moment so far 

Judah Turned 5

I finally discovered how to do my pictures! Yay! Maybe now I can start blogging again. Also, life seems to be "slowing down" as much as it can as a family of 6. Clara starts school on Monday--There will be tears. I will home school Judah this year and keep the others from killing themselves playing nicely during his lesson times. There are so many monumental moments that I will re-cap here soon. For reals this time.

Thursday, June 12, 2014


I want to revive this blog...oh I really do. Including the updated family pictures and everything. Life has a way of moving so quickly--I barely realize how much time has passed. There has been so much I have missed on here...I think I have forgotten Christmas, Wesley and Judah's birthday and a whole slurry of other activities. Sorry! Hopefully I will be able to maintain this a bit over the next few months.

I am still having issues getting my photos off of my phone and onto my computer...I have no idea how to fix that...But these are a few from Easter. I know LAME!
 We celebrated Easter with my dad and step mom--they made the whole family Chimichangas and they were amazing. The kids had a blast Easter Egg hunting and hanging out with the cousins.
Clara is starting public school in August--a joyful and sad thing for this mama. I know it is the right thing for both of us, but it is so hard to let my baby go into someone else's care for 7 hours! I have to depend on the Lord's mercy for her protection, her safety and that His sweet spirit will protect her heart & mind from being turned to the world.
Judah will be staying home and doing home school for kindergarten. I am excited about this--bonding with him in a special way and teaching the basics of our faith to his heart and mind. I am excited to see him grow in self confidence in the knowledge he has--his heart is so tender and easily discouraged if answers don't come right away!
Wesley is...oh what do we say about Wesley. He is all boy. He loves to play, rough house and be silly. He is learning the art of telling jokes and being the "funny one". He is developing the sweetest most tender love towards Julia. Often when we go places he is the first one to check on her, make sure she is with us and want to hold her hand. He is definitely walking that fine line between boyhood and toddler-hood. Sometimes my mommy heart explodes as I see him mature, and breaks at the same time that this little one who was "my baby" for so long grows and achieves new things.
Julia--my sweet happy Julia-- continues to grow and develop daily. It seems that every time I turn around she has learned some thing new or is working on a new skill. It is all about the thighs! She is a chunk and I love it. Still the happiest baby I have ever met. Easy smile and content in almost all circumstances. She is eating EVERYTHING she can get her hands on and is always very expressive when she tries new flavors and textures. She has mastered scooting around the house and will do a traditional baby crawl on the carpet. The kids compete for her attention. She is dearly loved. She has a cheering section every where she goes, and with every accomplishment, she is met with kisses and hugs. The kids run to me all day long and say things like, "look mom! Julia is_____________" I never miss a moment...and there is something about this sweet time with the littles that I don't want to miss a moment either.
We do have a lot of major changes coming up in our family...I will need this blog to get my thoughts and funny moments out. Hopefully I can iron out my computer kinks. I also have some beautiful things to share about our open adoption journey but the time just hasn't been right--another reason for silence for so long. We are good. We love. We live. And hopefully we Blog! 

Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Computer Woes

I know virtually nothing about computers...and mine has been acting up. I cannot upload any pictures for some reason and that's a major reason why I have not blogged in such a long time. I hate that. There is so much to catch up I hardly know where to start. Although I'd like to think my self a compelling writer, I know most people come here for the photos.

Everyone is doing great! We are nearing the end of the home school year (can I get a Hallelujah?)
Clara has done amazing this year--especially considering all of the changes, a new home, a new baby, a broken leg (Wesley) and ALL the house projects. I amazed that we are nearing the home stretch. We made the decision that next year she will be enrolled in a local elementary school with a Spanish immersion program. She will enter in with her peers and do 1st grade--although that is the grade we are doing in home school. Because of her December birthday, they wouldn't budge. That's OK, it will give her a lot of time to adjust to the routine of school and learning a new language. One thing that solidifies my joy in home schooling is that Clara accepted Christ as her personal Lord and savior (yes I have a picture of the moment we had together!) and Low and Behold--I learned about it during our home school lesson as we were discussing the Bible portion for the day. Never underestimate the impact a simple conversation can make! Listen to your kids and hear the questions they are asking.

Although Judah is age ready for school, he's not really ready! The more parents I talked to the more confident I become in our decision to keep him home one more year--and yes, I will be home schooling him for kindergarten. Although I was initially planning to put both of them in together, there is just no peace for my mommy heart when I think of him going to school in 5 months. Home is where he needs to be and I have a great opportunity to invest in his education foundation in a new way...without the watchful eye/ correction of his doting big sister. Judah is by far our most verbal kid. He can talk non stop all. day. long. We are hoping that skill serves him well as a radio or TV host at some point in his life. We also hear him teaching his brother about EVERYTHING and interpreting Wesley's jibber jabber.

Wesley is 3 and is giving us every bit as much of a challenge as his big brother and sister did at this age. Three is harder than 2 for our family!( we had such a fun 3rd birthday party for him but again, the pictures wouldn't work!)  His leg is fully recovered and he is all crazy boy. If you ask him his name and he is being coy--he will say BATMAN. We recently took away his "lamby" aka bio-hazardous waste. The kid sucked on that thing like a pacifier and we let it go on for too long. It's been a sad hard transition for him--he now has found other things to suck on...we have a ways to go. But one sweet thing is that he is coming to me and giving me the sweetest snuggles and kisses ever. I love that kid to the moon and back. With him being the "baby" for such a long time (for us) I am not sure if that position has been fully changed in my heart when it comes to him. He is growing like a weed and eats so much food. We joke regularly that I will have to start working just to pay for his food bill when we hit junior high.

Julia. Oh Julia. I wish I could let people have a window to my heart to see the way that the Holy Spirit has melded my heart with hers. No she did not come from my body--but you cannot tell my heart that. Some times i think that people may be suspicious of how adoptive parents love wholeheartedly their children. I love her every ounce the same as my biological children and it is a miracle. Something that is supernatural that I can take no credit for. God is so good. She is meeting developmental milestones and changing & growing every day. She is loud and fits perfectly in our family in that respect. She has learned to sit up on her own which I always feel is such a huge deal! Their perspective changes completely and our interactions/play becomes different. She's eating solid food--and I think wants to be eating more than we're doing--as fast as she can learn how to do it I am feeding it to her. She is still the happiest and most laid back baby ever. She goes with the flow. She is beginning to show quite a bit of preference towards me--which at this point I don't mind. I love to know that she feels the same way about me as I do her.

Owen and I are busier in our relationships than we have ever been. Our relationship. The 4 kids relationships. Our family relationships. Our small group relationships. And now we have birth family relationships. We feel privileged that the Lord has given us the rich blessing of learning how to navigate, encourage and point others to him through all of these lives. Oh but we are learning too. In previous posts I had mentioned that I was unsure if we would have on-going relationship with our birth family...oh how we longed for that and agonized over the fact that they were perhaps not happening (especially on behalf of Julia). But God is healing, moving, and changing hearts. We have recently had contact with both birth parents and extended family. We are learning as we go--definitely not something we are accustomed to--but God is covering us and them with His grace and mercy. Maybe some day I can share in detail the way that God has moved and is moving in these lives and through our relationships and what they mean. They feel to sacred to just lay it out there right now and I don't want to say anything without permission. There are so many thoughts & experiences related to a birth family relationship--it is difficult to keep things quiet--especially because I am a verbal processor!

So much. So much. So much. So good. So loved. So blessed.

Sunday, January 26, 2014

Anyone still out there?

Oh man. I am so far behind. First things first.
I tried to post pictures but for some reason it wont let me!

Just after my last post, we lost our dear, wonderful, sassy, God-lover martriarc of our family. Grandma Dorothy Maurer. We know she is restored and whole worshiping her Lord and savior in heaven right this moment. Although we miss her we know she is where she has always meant to be. We had a special memorial service for her on November 11--what would have been her and Grandpa's 62nd wedding anniversary. It was the most amazing memorial I have ever been to. We laughed a lot. We cried enough. We celebrated. We worshiped. It was beautiful. I want mine to be just like it--my family remembering my funny quircks, but celebrating the legacy that I leave--I pray that they know like Grandma taught--nothing really matters except knowing Christ and loving Him with our lives.

On that same day, at the wake at Tom and Joy's house, we had a wonderful family time continuing to reminice about Grandma. The kids had played hard and eaten tons of food all day. Late in the afternoon Wesley and Judah were sitting on the carpet playing with cars with a large crowd of adults within sight. Wesley gets up and is immediately crying that "cry" that every mom knows something is wrong. I took him into another room to see if I could calm him down and he was more and more upset, and then he started sweating...hmmm. We thought he had a leg cramp and were rubbing it much to his dismay. Owen reminded me to think logically--(Of Course!) that clearly he could not have hurt himself sitting on the floor. We just needed to get home. We loaded all 6 of us in the car and I rode in the back seat with him. He cried all the way home. We gave him some OTC pain medicine and a shower. He fell asleep for about 30 minutes. Then he woke up and began crying again. We frantically looked for an urgent care as it was close to 9 pm--didn't want to take him to the ER.
I called my dad who happened to be in town (thank God!) and asked if he would go with me. We drove to an urgent care and Wesley did not make a peep the whole way there...he even told me "I walk now" when we got there and I am thinking this was all for not...He put one toe down and was screaming in pain. Ok--so we were here for something. We were seen almost immediately and the NP though this presentation was strange but ordered an x-ray anyway. Wesley was crying and shaking at this point and as the technitian scanned the x-ray onto the computer--I could see the complete spiral tibia fracture. I told her don't move him again because I could see the break and started crying. So good to have my dad there--who promptly reminded me that I needed to have my mommy pants on and I could not cry infront of Wesley--I could cry later. And I did.
They asked if they could give him something for the pain--YES PLEASE! Give him anything you can. They splinted him and sent us home with a large amount of medicine to keep him comfortable.
We were up all night long with him writhing in pain. It was one of the worst nights as a parent ever.
The next day we were able to see a pediatric orthopedist who explained that these types of breaks are not that uncommon for boys his age...something about weight distribution and high speed moves! Yeah that sounds like our Wes.
He was given a hard cast and a large amount of narcotics--for a two year old. He was completely imobile (unwilling to have ANY weight/pain) for 2 weeks. He was on a lot of medicine and very "special" with side effects. He was in his full leg (above the knee) cast for 6 weeks and then in a boot for 4 weeks--and is mostly recovered at this point.
We barely left the house--no parks, no playgroups, no story times. Managing 4 kids is a lot...managing a newborn and a kid with a broken leg seemed almost impossible some days. I am so grateful to our friends and family who came to visit us when we were so homebound! I didn't leave the house by myself with the kids unless I absolutely had to--I am just starting to get back in the groove of leaving again...